


Humagears Don't Need Santa

by Wei (wei_jiangling)



Category: Kamen Rider Zero-One
Genre: Christmas fic, Family antics, Fluff, Gen, Horobi does not understand his kids, the Ark has to tell him not to be a jerk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-21
Updated: 2019-12-21
Packaged: 2021-02-26 08:00:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,202
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21880024
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wei_jiangling/pseuds/Wei
Summary: Jin gets into the Christmas spirit, to Horobi's dismay.
Comments: 6
Kudos: 16
Collections: Another Toku Holiday Special (2019)





	Humagears Don't Need Santa

**Author's Note:**

  * For [orbitalknight](https://archiveofourown.org/users/orbitalknight/gifts).



"Hey Horobi, have I been good this year?" 

Horobi had been deep in contemplation about their next move against the humans when he was pulled from his thoughts by this question. Leave it to Jin to ask such a thing out of the blue. He turned toward where Jin was sitting by the computer, one eyebrow slightly raised. "What nonsense are you reading now?" 

Jin frowned and didn't answer the question. "Have I?"

"I suppose." Jin had had his moments of disobedience off and on, and his tendency to look up strange human concepts was starting to seem problematic, but overall, he had been doing well for their cause. The moment the words were out of his mouth, a wide grin spread over Jin's face. Clearly, he had given the answer he'd wanted.

"Yay, then Santa will bring me presents!" 

Horobi stared at him flatly. "Who?"

"Santa. It says it right here." He gestured to the computer. "If someone was good during the year, then Santa will come and bring them presents on Christmas." 

Ah, the human holiday coming up. He had heard of that much, at least. But he had been right; this was strange human nonsense if he'd ever heard it. "You shouldn't believe everything you read, Jin." It was probably sufficient to his case to leave it at that, but when Jin looked both disappointed and uncertain in reply, he continued. "Besides, that's for humans. Santa wouldn't bring presents to Humagears." Now the disappointment had won. 

"There isn't a Santa for Humagears?" Jin asked dejectedly. 

"Of course not," he replied. After all, what use did Humagears have for frivolous gifts? 

Jin fell silent, and he thought that would be the last of it, until a few minutes later, Jin suddenly said, "Maybe you could make one." 

Horobi blinked. "What?"

"Santa," Jin said, as if this were a perfectly serious and reasonable request. "You made me and Ansatsu-chan. Maybe you could make a Santa for Humagears and he can give us presents. And then when we make new friends, they can get presents, too." 

It was such a baffling idea that it took Horobi a moment to even process it. Why should he make another Humagear for such a ridiculous purpose as participating in a human holiday? "Now you're just being silly," he replied, and watched Jin's shoulders slump as he turned back to the computer. 

Not for the first time, Horobi wondered whether he should stop letting Jin look things up on there at all. 

\---

"Horobi! Ansatsu-chan! Come look!" Jin called excitedly from where he stood by a window. When Horobi joined him, he saw that the ground outside had been coated in a layer of white, with more glittering flakes falling from the sky.

"It's snow," he said matter-of-factly as his second son joined them to look out the window curiously; he had never seen such a thing before. The concept was not so new to Jin, but then, he had always been easily entertained. 

"I want to go play! Can I, Horobi?" And of course, this question was equally predictable. But he supposed he saw no harm in agreeing. They were not quite ready yet to launch another attack, and if nothing else, it would keep Jin from getting on the computer and finding more human ideas to poison his thoughts with. He nodded, and Jin immediately took a bouncing step toward the door. Then he realised that his brother was still staring out the window, and turned around to tug at his arm. "You come too, Ansatsu-chan!" 

The younger of the two seemed nothing short of bewildered, and looked to Horobi for confirmation. He nodded again. Then Jin looked at him hopefully and he said, "I'll stay here." A brief flash of disappointment passed over his older son's features, but was quickly washed out again by his excitement over the snow as he pulled his still confused brother out the door. 

Horobi watched as they reappeared outside the window, Jin jumping around in the snow while Ansatsu knelt down to examine the unfamiliar substance more closely. Soon, Jin had gathered a pile of snow into a ball in his hands and Ansatsu looked up in surprise when that ball of snow hit him in the shoulder and puffed into a spray of individual snowflakes. Shortly after, the two were trading harmless attacks of snow quite enthusiastically in the space between this and the next decrepit building of Daybreak Town. 

Horobi could not claim to understand, but he supposed such an activity was good for honing their fighting reflexes. 

Jin grinned toward the window and waved as he noticed Horobi standing there, and Ansatsu took advantage of the distraction to lob a snowball at Jin, and then follow it up with another one--perhaps playfully--at Horobi. There was a soft thud against the window as the ball hit it and scattered. Horobi watched the remaining clumps of snow slide down the window, and then turned and walked away. He had work to be doing. 

\---

"This is for you." Jin told him, holding out an oddly shaped package that had been sloppily wrapped in paper. Horobi had not the faintest idea what it might be, but it was decidedly not a Progrise Key. 

"What is it?" he asked, and Jin's face brightened with excitement. 

"A present," he said. "Open it." 

Horobi frowned. Hadn't they been through this already? Was Jin still hung up on that Christmas stuff he had found online? "I thought I told you to forget about that 'Santa' nonsense." 

"There's no Santa for Humagears," he conceded. "I remember. But that doesn't mean I can't get you a present." He pushed the package toward Horobi again, who grudgingly took it this time. Unwrapping it revealed what appeared to be one of the pinecones that had recently littered the ground outside, except covered haphazardly with some sort of adhesive and shiny flecks in an absurd variety of colors. It was the most utterly frivolous thing Horobi had ever seen. He had no idea where Jin had even managed to obtain the glitter. 

"Did you make this?" he asked, disbelieving that Jin had indulged in quite so incredible a waste of time, but the only response he got was a pleased nod. Jin almost seemed proud of himself. 

Well. That would not do. He was about to crush the ridiculous, fragile thing in his hand when he felt a tug from the Ark, urging him to accept the gift. He couldn't begin to understand the reasoning, but if the Ark willed it, then he supposed he had no choice. So instead he set it on a nearby shelf where it would be both unharmed and appropriately out of the way.

"If you want to get me a present in the future, take another Progrise Key from the humans," he told him, and left it at that. 

"Okay!" Jin agreed brightly, and then bounced off to grab a second, similar package that Horobi hadn't noticed on the desk until his overly excitable son picked it up, calling for his brother. 

Horobi shook his head as Jin ran off to the other room. What a troublesome child he had.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for this adorable prompt. I had a blast writing it.


End file.
